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The Ferguson Recipes – Recipes, Plain & Simple
The Ferguson Recipes

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Caesar Salad With Witty Patter
Caesar Salad With Witty Patter
{Serving suggestion only*}
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This entertaining Caesar Salad recipe transforms tableside preparation into a performance with witty commentary. The theatrical instructions guide the chef through the classic steps of crushing garlic in salt, creating an emulsion with oil, and incorporating traditional ingredients like anchovies and egg. The detailed choreography ensures perfect execution while delighting dinner guests with the showmanship. Complete with suggestions for appropriate jokes and timing, this recipe delivers both culinary excellence and memorable entertainment. Perfect for hosts who enjoy adding personality to their dinner parties while serving 6 guests a restaurant-quality salad experience.
No Jump Zone
Ingredients
Have your husband toss the salad while the guests sit at their places finishing their aperitif and you do last minute chores.
Prepare for him:
Wooden salad bowl with 1 t. of salt and 2 split garlic cloves set directly at the host's place on your dining table.
To his right, on a tray or cart, place glass bowl of chilled torn romaine (about 1 lb.).
In 6 small bowls, such as custards, place (in this order):
  1.    6 T. olive or salad oil
  2.    2 T. wine vinegar, 1 T. lemon juice and 1/2 t. Worcestershire sauce
  3.    4 finely cut fillets of anchovy
  4.    1 t. dry mustard, 1 t. black pepper and 1 T. Parmesan cheese
  5.    24 small croutons (bread cubes, browned in butter, flavored with a garlic clove)
  6.    1 fresh unbroken egg
Directions
Before he starts the process below, cover the egg with hot water.
The five minutes he takes to mix the salad will coddle it properly.
He should now quickly proceed as follows, keeping up a witty patter throughout and making all moves with a flourish:
  1. Spin the salad bowl and crush the garlic in the salt over the sides of the bowl. A regular dinner fork is best for this.
  2. Remove the garlic, but leave the salt. Add the oil and beat vigorously-twirling the bowl at a 45° angle all the while. The guests love this.
  3. Now: Stir in, in rapid succession, the bowl of lemon, wine, vinegar, etc.; the bowl of anchovies; and the bowl of cheese, pepper, etc.
  4. Make sure this is whipped well.
  5. Dump in the greens and toss a moment with your salad fork and spoon.
  6. Add the bread cubes on top and then with a final flourish, break the coddled egg. It will slide out of sight quickly.
  7. Tell one joke as you put in the coddled egg. This usually distracts any squeamish guests. Jokes may be adjusted to fit the time and the crowd. I often have church goers present so try to have a slightly risqué joke. They seem to like these and feel quite safe to laugh heartily at this point.
  8. Now toss thoroughly but gently. "Don't soak the bread" is the key word.
  9. When you finish tossing, gently place a generous helping on each salad plate and let everyone eat this before your wife starts serving the main course.
The recipe serves six people, but you should plan on some delighted, eager guest asking for seconds.
You can quietly roll out the dirty dishes on the cart when you go out for wine.
Servings\Yield
Serves 6
Nutrition Facts
Nutrition Per Serving - Calories: 170; Total Fat: 15g (Saturated Fat: 2.5g); Cholesterol: 35mg; Sodium: 410mg; Total Carbohydrates: 6g (Dietary Fiber: 1g, Sugars: 1g); Protein: 4g
*Nutrition information is provided as a general estimate only. Nutrient information is not available for all ingredients, and is based on available nutrient data. Variations may occur based on ingredient brands and preparation methods.
💬 Uncle Dave says... This was a favorite salad of Anne R. and J. Carl Ferguson. I chose to copy the text verbatim. Keep in mind that this cookbook was printed in the 1970's, so you might need to forgive the sexist tone. Also, apparently some people didn't know what croutons were in those days.
🧑‍🍳 The Cook:  J. Carl Ferguson, Jr. 🔑 Keywords: salads
🗂️ Categories: 🥗 Salads, 🍅 Veggies
📚 Collections: Cooking with Carl, Hugh & Your Friends, From The Ferguson Family, The TFR Cookbook
Caesar Salad With Witty Patter was added on February 01, 2007 and last updated on June 23, 2025.
*Serving suggestion only. 😂 If a food photo doesn't look like it was taken by a monkey named Frank, it was most likely AI generated and not the result of Frank's minimal culinary or photographic skills. Unless you failed the "I'm not a robot" test, your recipes will probably not look like the ones in the pictures. See Creamy Turkey Veggie Soup to read more about AI images.
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📄Recipe Disclaimer: While The Ferguson Recipes strives to present reliable and delicious recipes, please note that most of the recipes on this site have not undergone rigorous testing or independent verification. For this reason, we strongly recommend that you always follow standard food safety guidelines when preparing any dish. Eggs: If you make a recipe that uses raw eggs, please consider using pasteurized eggs. Allergens: Food allergens have not been identified in each individual recipe. Please use caution if you have any food allergies. If you have any questions or concerns about a specific recipe, please feel free to contact us.
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